Seeking The Void

Becoming is a process, being is not

Spider Anecdote and Karma/Compassion

Yesterday I was in my garage when I looked down and noticed a spider. I’m a fairly compassionate person with all animals, going out of my way to make sure I do not harm them while usually leaving them to wander on their own. However, when I saw this spider I was a little surprised that my gut reaction was negative. I didn’t think to kill it, but after two years of living with my girlfriend — who’s scared of insects — I’ve grown accustomed to see them as a nuisance. Depending on the day, she will ask me to take it out, or she will kill it herself. Even though she knows I don’t like when she kills them, so inevitably I end up having to take them outside every day. However, it’s a bit of a pain to catch every insect and take them outside. Looking at this animal in my garage, I noticed that I briefly but distinctly wished this animal was dead and out of my life. I stopped to reflect on this unnatural response for me. I thought about Buddha and how his whole spiritual quest was to help rid suffering from every creature. I thought about Karma and the belief that doing bad deeds leads to good outcomes in future lives. While I don’t believe this myself, the thought of it enabled me to shift my perspective. For one of the first times in my life, I wanted to help another creature not because of my own ethics but because of the…